101 Rules for Minecraft
by mynamemattersnot
Summary: Whoever thought that a world with infinite rules would have rules and consequences?


**Author's Note: Something I had to try. Tell me what you think of it. I do not own Minecraft or anything that I made a reference to.**

1\. Do not steal a block from an enderman.

2\. Do not perform a play for an enderdragon.

3\. Do not push Steve off a cliff.

4\. Do not shove a zombie in a minecart.

5\. Do not tease a creeper.

6\. Do not breed spiders.

7\. Do not leave the torches lit in a wooden house.

8\. Do not use a spider as a bull for a rodeo.

9\. Do not put a princess dress on Steve.

10\. Do not paint Steve's house pink.

11\. Do not throw a water balloon at Herobrine.

12\. Do not drink milk mixed with lava.

13\. Do not shear a sheep and turn it into a human.

14\. Do not use a minecart to ride down a dirt hill.

15\. Do not stalk a creeper.

16\. Do not build a house on lava.

17\. Do not use a lava slide like a water slide.

18\. Do not sail apon the seas.

19\. Do not awaken Notch from a nap.

20\. Do not draw a penguin on the face of a zombie.

21\. Do not cut holes in a villager's clothing.

22\. Do not make armor out of wheat.

23\. Do not hold a diamond lottery.

24\. Do not force Steve into slave labor.

25\. Do not ride the enderdragon.

26\. Do not feed the skeletons.

27\. Do not feed a cow steak.

28\. Do not pour water all over your ocelot.

29\. Do not create a world in which there's no respawning.

30\. Do not jump off a hundred block building into wheat claiming that you are Ezio Auditore.

31\. Do not give a creeper an atomic bomb.

32\. Do not tie the legs of an octopus.

33\. Do not break the speed limit while driving a minecart.

34\. Do not throw an apple at a zombie pigman.

35\. Do not keep a zombie as a pet.

36\. Do not yell, "Quit crying!" at a ghast.

37\. Do not try entering the nether dressed as a wolf.

38\. Do not set yourself on fire.

39\. Do not use TNT to blow up your own house.

40\. Do not sleep outside whilst it is raining.

41\. Do not shove a book into a zombie's face.

42\. Do not spill bleach all over a enderman.

43\. Do not use sugar cane as a stripping pole.

44\. Do not stand near a lava pool.

45\. Do not shave all of Steve's hair.

46\. Do not switch places with a chicken.

47\. Do not invent a way to destroy obsidian blocks.

48\. Do not take pictures of Herobrine and post it on the internet.

49\. Do not pull a prank on Herobrine.

50\. Do not try to tame a creeper.

51\. Do not walk into a dark cave.

52\. Do not pounce on an ocelot.

53\. Do not twerk against a tree.

54\. Do not sell binoculars to an enderman.

55\. Do not force a villager to give you a piggy back ride.

56\. Do not burn down a village.

57\. Do call the ghost busters to take care of a ghast.

58\. The cake is not a lie.

59\. Do not dress up your pet wolf for a dog pagent.

60\. Do not use a fishing pole on an octopus.

61\. Do not ghost ride the ghast.

62\. Do not call a zombie pigman fat.

63\. Do not hoard wild animals.

64\. Do not try to eat Steve while he is dressed as a cow.

65\. Do not offer yourself as a prize for a zombie.

66\. Do not shove Steve in a chest and then mail him to the dessert.

67\. Do not build a water park in a dessert.

68\. Do not build a lava park in the artic.

69\. Do not freeze a pig and eat it as a popsicle.

70\. Do not confuse an animal to be a pinata.

71\. Do not play pin the tail on the enderman.

72\. Do not challenge your friends with hide and go seek.

73\. Do not play spin the bottle with monsters.

74\. Do not bake a pie for zombies using human flesh.

75\. Do not create an Olympics for spiders.

76\. Do not steal books from the stronghold library.

77\. Do not prank call Steve.

78\. Do not spray Herobrine with a hot sauce gun.

79\. Do not play limbo with a zombie.

80\. Do not tie Steve's shoe laces together.

81\. Do not lose a map and then get lost.

82\. Do not drink ocean water.

83\. Do not try to dive in a lava pool.

84\. Do not call a skeleton anorexic.

85\. Do not grow grass on your head.

86\. Do not drink the milk of a mooshroom cow.

87\. Do not throw a party in the middle of the night.

88\. Do not sing "Thriller" by Micheal Jackson in front of a bunch of zombies and skeletons.

89\. Do not teach a zombie how to dance like a robot.

90\. Do not use your enchanting supplies to enchant a tree.

91\. Do not challenge a skeleton to an archery tournament.

92\. Do not hiss behind a creeper.

93\. Do not kick a chicken.

94\. If you are an enderman, do not stare at a mirror.

95\. Do not place a hoe on a fence pole.

96\. Do not poke a spider's eye.

97\. Do not flood your house with milk.

98\. Do not duck tape a creeper's mouth shut.

99\. Do not stick a "Kick Me" sign on Steve's back.

100\. Do not egg an ocelot.

101\. Do not replace the Minecraft blocks with legos.

**Author's Note: So was it enjoyable? Did I get you to laugh or face palm? Reviews are welcome! 8D!**


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